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"
apathy is harder than it looks
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3.4.04
A wave of relief rolled over him, towing along a feeling of disgust in its wake. He poured the minor-key music as if he were a mediocre writer who overflows his prose with smilies in an attempt to woo his readers with the skills he developed in third grade. It's funny. He also learned cursive in third grade and yet he doesn't use it at all now while smilies inundate his writing.
He fought himself for a while; believed he could change into something beautiful: the kind of hero that saves an entire town from a deadly flood. Not only did he fail in trying to stop the waters, but he failed to stay alive afterward. That part of himself that didn't drown with the flood, he now drowns in the resulting sorrows. Drowning isn't that bad of a way to die. At least you hallucinate before you go under. Maybe he is out there believing he really was heroic before taking his final gasp; a final spit in the face of fate.
05:10
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