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apathy is harder than it looks
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31.12.02
Now....MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF HOMEWORK!!!!!
23:36
booyah!! I have an application in!! woo woo props to me woo woo props!!!
23:36
eating marshmallows alive is the only way to go...
18:19
Neal was depressed. Ever since that morning when his usual daily toast was incenerated in the toaster his day had been horrible. "It seems like nothing works these days," he had thought to himself. He slowly sunk deeper and deeper into his chair until he realized it was time. He should have done it years ago. All these years of his life had been wasted on attempts at getting by. He must end it. After of a few minutes of rummaging through drawers he found his father's colt revolver. Sitting in the kitchen with the gun on his lap, he wondered what his parents would think when they get home. "Ah it doesn't matter." he muttered. Unlatching the safety, he aimed and fired.
The toaster exploded in a hail of lead. All of its interworkings were strewn across the counter. "I'll buy them a new one for Christmas." Neal thought to himself as he set the gun down.
00:49
30.12.02
That last post was in Irish!!!
23:47
Go bpléasca na gráinneoga cealgrúnacha do mhamaí.
23:47
Happiness still is possible.
17:03
Is there true love? My sources say no. Because there is no truth, there can be no true love. The world is composed of unfiniate mini-truths each belonging to a different person, each conflicting with another. Since different people have different conflicting views on truth, it cannot exsist.
17:03
29.12.02
Religion furnishes the weak-minded with comfort and the strong-minded with furniture.
13:31
28.12.02
"There is nothing like a four-year-old on sugar." ~ My father
21:43
Dan and Brian (And Chris) - I love you guys and if I were to get run over by my mother you could have all my magic cards. Dan~ you get instants and sorcery Brian ~ you get creatures Chris ~ you would get all my enchantments Lands~ I dunno you could shuffle them up and deal them out I suppose
15:50
27.12.02
"boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop, boop boop bop boop boop"
~ New Order "Confusion"
12:58
"Three important rules for breaking up
Don't put off breaking up when you know you want to
Prolonging the situation only makes it worse
Tell him honestly, simply, kindly, but firmly
Don't make a big production
Don't make up an elaborate story
This will help you avoid a big tear jerking scene
If you want to date other people say so
Be prepared for the boy to feel hurt and rejected
Even if you've gone together for only a short time,
And haven't been too serious,
There's still a feeling of rejection
When someone says she preferes the company of others
To your exclusive company,
But if you're honest, and direct,
And avoid making a flowery emotional speech when you break the news,
The boy will respect you for your frankness,
And honestly he'll appreciate the kind of straight foward manner
In which you told him your decision
Unless he's a real jerk or a cry baby you will remain friends!"
~Nada Surf "popular"
12:57
26.12.02
YES!
20:56
don't ever worry...
11:24
AGAIN WITH THE GHETTO!
I'm sorry this all caps must be annoying I shall cease
Here is a poem perfectly entitled "My parents are nuts"
I've got the guts to say
my parents are nuts
They sleep in coffins all day
When they get up at night
it give me a fright
and this is what they say...
feed the dog
wash your clothes
put the seat down
wipe your nose
you should pick up those crumbs
boy are my parents a pair of lazy bums!
June 15, 2001
I have composed a brief yet beautiful poem after running at night in the rain. I just revised it and it goes as follows:
sight- just one contact
night - doesn't help that
flight- feet hardly touch the ground
fright - no one else is around
wet - the rain into my eyes
yet this is my exercise
04:29
MORE GHETTO STUFF!!!
why don't you just come to my house and steal my writen journal?
this is an awesome song with an awesome drawing
This is a song
about my love
the atypical girl
She hates pepsi
She won't try coke
She doesn't drink
She will not smoke
She's atypical
in a boring world
and when she acts normal
you don't understand
a word
she says
04:20
eccentric is a word people try to use in order to put down those who are happier then themselves
04:15
GHETTO NEAL EXPLAINITORY POEM ALERT
actually this poem explains nothing, but it is pretty stinking cool
my favorite word is cracker
I like the crker sound
I love to scream it out loud
when no one else is around
Furthermore, in my absence of sleep, I have completed my essay of college proportions and thus anticipate reaquisition of magical pieces of paper confiscated from me by my mother
04:14
songs to get ~ "Catch you" by the Get Up Kids
"Of minor prophets and their prostitute wives" by Pedro the Lion
04:07
ici est un poem j'ecrive a ce moment
sad was i when my soul cried
sad was i when my heart died
sad was i when you walked out the door
sad was i forevermore
sad was i when you played dead
sad was i when my eyes bled
sad was i when you spurned me
sad was i for eternity
sad was i till the end
sad was I when you called me "friend"
sad was I when I felt no more
sad was I forevermore
04:02
alas I cannot sleep
it is no matter
03:55
Merry Non-Denominational Food and Retail Based Winter Day
02:23
Because I could not stop for Death—
He kindly stopped for me—
Emily Dickinson is awesome
02:11
I'm not sam...I'm WHoaaahh!
01:56
There is no such thing as following in someone’s footsteps. Each person walks her own path. Since the departure and the arrival are the same for each life there is no advatage to following that of another. It is best to follow one’s own path and loving it.
01:54
at least I have friends that will tell me when I don't have my sanity
01:53
25.12.02
at least I have my sanity
17:29
I refuse all but the ataris
17:25
His nose was the first to hit. It exploded in a flash flood of blood, which caught the pavement in a vile embrace. Next, his spinal collumn shattered like an old used crumpled slinky that no one want to or is able to use.
17:24
Giving hints is easy. Taking them is what rips your heart out your ear and smears it across the floor.
15:31
24.12.02
ALL HAIL PHIL!!!
19:30
Nadka is in the paper! wow!
19:29
debauchery!!!
19:29
gossip is a mechanical monkey that just won't quit...until samurai jack slams his sword through its robotic soul!!!! YEAH!! Props to samurai jack! woo woo props!
18:19
mmm forbidden gummi...
18:17
Two Towers was amazing and no Phil did not brainwash me. I have come to that conclusion completely on my own.
18:16
samurai jack, garbage, antisocial tendencies, and dreams sigh... I love vacation
02:59
23.12.02
There's a girl...she a walkin' down the street, many times...I gotta make her mine. Gotta make her mine whoa ohh I gotta make her mine!
13:34
"I'm starting to think that I'm kinda shy, or at least I'd like to be" ~ When they really get to know you they will run ~ Pedro the Lion
13:32
everyone loves a cowardly lion...
13:30
My theories on relationships~
There are two steps to getting into a loving relationship. Flirting and Jumping. Too much of either or too little makes for relationship starting problems.
There are two types of relationships. Ones based on infatuation that don't last and Ones that are based on love that do.
13:00
The only people who are humored by the "Don't worry be happy" quote are those that worry.
12:57
22.12.02
Those who succeed in happiness are those who find security where there is none.
01:44
All day she had been denying me, knifing me in the back each time she would look away. Then she would turn and shoot me the look. It would seal my wounds instantaneously and I would be mended, invigorated, and joyous, until she would turn her back again and let me crumble.
01:42
21.12.02
Their arms encircled each other in a loving embrance. Three minutes later they were naked, standing in hot streams of water in their homes asking themselves what went wrong with that night. He reached over for the soap; it wasn't there. She tried to get the shampoo; there wasn't any. They improvised; he used shampoo for soap; she used soap in her hair. It didn't work well. His towel was gone. She couldn't find her conditioner. He was forced to air dry; she had to go without.
10:26
20.12.02
At least I have my sense of freedom.
22:16
Tonight I saw myself as a child in old chrismas home videos. I was very violent, whiny, and selfish. I am glad I am older. There is nothing glorious about being a young child. Sure you may look cute, but you aren't going to remember anything anyway and you are throughly incapable of free thought that makes life fun, much less love.
22:16
Nothing helps sadness like crying.
22:13
my mother makes me mad
she shall suffer soon
17:20
Akdan.
01:24
19.12.02
Falalalalalalalala!
23:47
BAM!!
23:09
Go ahead, THROW AWAY YOUR VOTE!!!!!!
23:08
GHETTO POEM AND APHORISM ALERT*
I have said before that it is unwise to dwell in the past. I have also said that everyone is a hypocrite. There are some beautiful events of the past that are worthy of remeberance. Here are some of my past scribblings:
It was one of those nights I wished I felt tired; just so if someone asked me how I felt I could tell them, if I had somebody.
The Crazy Haiku Section Section!
In the halls of school,
there is but one simple rule:
don't make eye contact.
Care for what you do.
If your pack is to heavy,
back will break in two.
Drawing in class
is a habit of mine,
since school is so slow.
All day in any way
School works to break the spirit
I won't let them win.
It is pathetic
how well I know all the halls.
I walk fluently.
Marevelous people
are sacrificing themselves
everyday in school.
I'm a fool
a sucker
a drip
a sap
a mistake
a fake
a fault
a mishap.
I want just one
under the sun
play with in rain
pleasure and pain
good times and bad
best that we had
I want just one
under the sun
with words such as "should" in existance one might actually believe is some kind of supreme will...BAH!
All you have to do to be happy,
Is realize that you are not sad.
All you have to do to be happy,
Is realize life isn't that bad.
23:04
Hate is necessary for love. If there were nothing but love, there would cease to be love. There would be nothing but nothing.
It can be looked at in a supression way as well. If you block out negative emotions, you inevitably block out positive emotions. You must let both flow or suffer under the burden of imbalance.
21:23
18.12.02
As I was wandering home, I admired the sky. It exploded with twenty different shades of slivery-blue from the stunning orange-red glow of the sun. The sun rested in a bank of thick clouds illuminating them and softening its own glow. Expanding from the sun, the clouds grew from dense to dappled; from darker to peachy orange. I was content, pondering that people can be divided into those who construct and those who demolish. A lady passing behind me noticed my snow-covered back and remarked, "It must have been some snow fight!" I smiled.
"No snow fight. Snow angels." She laughed and I walked on, head down, smiling at the irony.
17:55
There is nothing as beautiful as a lie, nor horrid.
07:11
17.12.02
There is no reason to mind what I say.
There is no reason to let me in your way.
There is no reason to answer when I call.
There is no reason to care if I rise of if I fall.
There is no reason to think about me.
There is no reason to wonder what I see.
There is no reason to care what I do,
Except for the reason that I love you.
21:47
too much magic can be dangerous to your health; it leads to poetry
21:45
Weird; what a boring way to describe someone so positively...bizzare.
15:49
Yeah Yeah Yeah I know... I'm weird, you're weird, everyone is weird, but he was..WEIRD!
15:48
School says ~ take off your hat as a sign of respect for others
Jewish and Amish religion says ~ wear a hat as a sign of respect for god
Apparently the school wants people to fight against the amish god and the jewish god.
12:27
I am in school!! Props to school!!! Yeah yeah props!!!!
12:25
I am tired of sleeping.
12:25
16.12.02
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
19:35
Sleep is for the weak.
Homework is for the weak.
School is for the weak.
Physical education is for the weak.
Be strong! Go out and build a snowfort!
06:56
She was scared away by his smile. She figured that if she entered and changed the life of someone as happy as him, she would only make his life sad.
He was not happy. He knew that she was out there somewhere and that he could never know the true taste of happiness until they had discovered each other. He sat and waited.
04:54
Yeah!! Props to happiness!! yeah yeah props!!!
03:11
Whew... For about five hours I didn't think I'd be able to post again. My last big post cause my blog to crash a bit. Thus I shall link to it now. Woky of the Jabber variety
03:08
14.12.02
I look around me. A dismal grey abyss creeps in with the waning light of the season. My family has abandoned me. My friends have fallen away leaving me out upon on my own barren limb. I had watched them go before me, swept away in the bitter breeze. Some had fallen gracefully, dancing not to their deaths, but until they ineviatably came. Others stared into their graves and let themselfs drop straight down. They found no pleasure in the decent for they were far to fixed upon the result. My time has come. I feel my roots straining. I hoped I can be one of the graceful ones, but I have to let go of all all inhibitions to truly float. With a burst I am freed, yet I almost immediately start to sink. Fear cluches my soul. I toss back in agony and I see her. Flying, soaring, sailing about she is magnificent even with no sun there to illuminate her blazing form. She sways to the left and I sway with her. She dips and I flip upward to meet her. We brush and part. I am heartbroken. I will meet her again. A northern breeze whips me toward her. I am there. I gentle fall into her embrace. Her form curls about mine locking us together and we fall in unison, side by side. The rest of the journey didn't matter. My heart was free to float as it choose next to hers. Finally we softly landed upon a soft pad of moss. Surrounding us lay our famlies and friends. Even as winter neared we smiled, knowing that there would be more just like us drifting in the gentle gusts.
22:52
monkies on my shoulders, monkies in the trees, monkies flying planes, but none on your knees.
21:25
Nealov domov. Sedime pri pocitaci a ja prave teraz, ano, prave teraz pisem odkaz pre teba. Co si myslis, ze napisem? Ja neviem, mozno nieco mudre, ci zlate, mile, alebo smiesne? Pre tentokrat nieco mudre. Zivot je prilis kratky, tak si ho ozime naplno! Suhlasis Neal?
Neviem kolko je teraz hodin, ked to citas, ale ak je uz neskoro, tak ti prajem dobru noc.
Sladke sny Ti praje Nadka
21:11
13.12.02
People are mostly creatures of the past. Very few actually live in the present. They spend far too much time lamenting over losses, holding grudges, and listening to outdated christmas music. Okay, being nostolgic is okay, even encouragable, but for the most part the past is nothing but an excuse for not enjoying life to its fullest. Let go and live.
17:46
I eat...therefore I still am
17:42
baby all I want for christmas is you....
17:35
HAHA I didn't land on my face...yet
17:35
12.12.02
How to be emo~
find a veritable babe
drop hints for a month
jump
land on cement on your face
get up
cry about it
repeat
22:32
nadka
22:31
leave on the lights,
I'm coming home.
turn off your head,
I don't want to roam.
22:27
The screams of the teenage rockers anguished by their star-crossed loves still echoed through his ears so he never heard the car coming. The stars glimmering behind him dialated, growing into moons, growing into suns, and suddenly devoring him alive. Smeared thorough the filthy slush of the road, his neck snapped instantly. His bike escaped out the other end of the car as a mangled heap, chewed beyond all recognition. His body didn't. It was caught between the axles of the car and dragged until there was nothing left of it but a dirty, bloody slush.
22:27
you always smell the one you love; the one you love the greatest
18:01
I smell
18:01
other times I realize my mother is wrong
17:58
sometimes it feels like the word "late" was invented to make me feel bad about myself
17:57
"or else everyone would be walking around in glad garbage bags.." said mr tenney.
"Who's going to come in...[wearing glad garbage bags]"
"NEAL!!!" replys the class enthusiastically and unanimously.
17:57
To complete the process of selling out, religious folk should unite to create a new Jesus oriented line of action figures. There could be God and Satan too. God would be a transformer from a woman to a man just to keep the feminists at bay and Satan would have a spinning head and shoot gak.
17:31
10.12.02
that's a cultivation I like to impressionate
04:19
9.12.02
what is the difference between a want and need? A need is nothing but an intense want based around survival. Where is it that the possession of game boy advances starts being necessary for survival and clothing stops? Maslow was wrong. There is something deeper.
04:04
the difference between love and infatuation is seven letters.
03:52
the difference between love and infatuation is that with love, when you stop liking someone, you love her. With infatuation, when you stop liking someone, you hate her.
03:51
8.12.02
("`-''-/").___..--''"`-._
`6_ 6 ) `-. ( ).` -. __ .`)
(_Y_.)' ._ ) `._ `. ``-..-'
..`--'_..-_/ /--'_.' ,'
(((' (((-((('' ((((
12:14
ohhh ultimate frisbee... I like... I miss...
I like it. I love it. I want some more of it!
12:03
time to jump...
11:59
play part I have STOP chorus member perhaps STOP more results to follow STOP love, STOP Neal
01:36
Song ~ one slow dance by Rufio
learn it, love it, let it go
01:35
People who are mean are better than those with inconsistant geniality. It's the people who smile at you as they are screwing you over that are to be hated.
01:34
Everyone is a hypocrite. Some people just are too foolish to ever admit their mistakes.
01:32
there'll be no tears in the end...
01:29
6.12.02
All people are evil. Those who pretend to be good are the greatest evil doers for they lie not only to the rest of mankind, but more importantly to themselves.
17:28
S-U-C-K--S that's the way you spell success!
17:28
3.12.02
"Jimmy went to the dentist today. They couldn't believe all the tooth decay. Cold like mold and cavity teeth. That's what you get when you eat sweets. He was sitting in the dentist's chair. I say! What a naughty boy! He had tooth decay! tooth decay tooth decay shalalala gingivitis tooth decay BRUSHA BRUSHA BRUSHA TOOTH DECAY! BRUSHA BRUSHA BRUSHA BRUSHA TOOOOTH DECAYYYYYY!!!" PROPS to sifl and olly! YEAH YEAH PROPS!!!
01:43
She was considered one of the most truthful girls in the community. Whenever asked a question, she would respond correctly and politely. She would never decieve others and because of this was widely loved. However, behind the thick walls of moral uprightness her heart rotted in the blackening dishonesty of self-denial.
01:16
Johnny Quest thinks we're WHAT?!
00:54
HOPE LIVES, until greg starts suggesting methods of bombing schuaman's house. Brian and Dan, are you guys in?
00:53
the only mistake he ever made was the sniffing of the toxic glue
00:50
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